Sinful Self-Esteem

A number of years ago, in a college classroom, a professor spoke a thought-provoking statement that has continued to roll around my head. He said, "To be completely honest, many people who struggle with low self-esteem actually have very high self-esteem." It's one of those statements that seems like a paradox, but I immediately understood what he meant. However, I've wrestled with the best way to communicate the truth of this statement.

This morning, during my devotional time, I came across this quote from C.H. Spurgeon that helps communicate this reality a little more clearly. So, I thought I would share it with you. In the future, you may see me working to bring some more clarity to the idea of sinful self-esteem.

Here's Spurgeon:

“Christian joy does not come from what we have, nor does sorrow come from what we lack. Our happiness does not come from the world, and neither does our depression—that is, if we live near to God. So it is not trouble that troubles saints; it is something far worse than that. I am afraid there are many Christians in great trouble who are so proud that they will not admit God has a right to deal with them as he is dealing. They think there ought to be some more lenient dispensations of kinder providence for them. They imagine themselves to be the kind of persons on whom the sun should always shine and whose path should be always smooth. And if it is not so, they think God is dealing harshly with them—that he is not kind to them—and they doubt his love.

We may tell them that the martyrs suffered far more than they do. We may point them to many of their fellow Christians who are in much worse circumstance than they are, but that will not reconcile them to their own trials. The fact is, there is a self-love about them that has exaggerated itself beyond all due proportions into a sinful self-esteem. And this proud, egotistical idea of what they ought to have and ought to be rebels against the sovereignty of God and refuses to submit to the will of the Most High. Our sorrows usually spring out of ourselves, and when self is conquered, sorrow is, to a real extent, banished from the human heart. We must get rid of this rebellion against the Most High, or else our hearts will continue to be troubled.”

(C.H. Spurgeon, Spurgeon Study Bible, Note on Jn 14:27, p. 1450)